Doing a Lot of Thinking

Watching Ruby (http://www.mystyle.com/mystyle/shows/ruby/index.jsp) has me thinking about my weight quite a bit more than I have in a while. For a very long time I've thought about it only when something bothered me, when I noticed that I was large and cumbersome, or when something was hurting, but watching that show has me thinking about all of the excuses that I make and how lazy I am. I really don't want to get up and do anything and I'm really good at defeating myself. I had a doctor's appointment for chest pain on the right side yesterday and she said she thinks it's from stress and prescribed Wellbutrin. I'm not at all pleased about being medicated, but something has to give. I found out that I didn't gain any weight over the holidays which is good, but when the scale reads 274 there's nothing to celebrate. My highest recorded weight was 276 so I'm feeling pretty low these days, but that number won't change unless I make the effort, so I'm moving in that direction. Today my husband found a book called Savor, Mindful Eating, Mindful Life by Thich Nhat Hanh and I'm looking forward to reading it. The thing is, I've read many, many great books, it's the implementation that I fail at.